I felt a chill going down my spine. It was my duty to always protect my little sister and seeing her in this state with all the bruises and scars just tore me up inside. Her back had a long scar, very similar to the ones on Solomon’s back. I knew only one thing that could make that scar; a sjambok. The police had used them mercilessly during the apartheid days and I wondered where Vera got such a scar from. “Don’t worry Dee, it’s not as bad as it looks. Besides, it healed a long while ago.”

“That doesn’t answer my question Vera, what happened to your back? Who did this to you?”

She put on one of my dry blouses, as she answered, “It’s not important Dee, what’s important right now is that I am here.” While she was buttoning up the blouse, I stormed across the room and pulled it off her so I could examine her back. Salt water streams flowed down my face as I held her firmly in my hand. It was hard to get my words past the nostalgic lump in my throat, remembering how I had always been her protector; it’s hard to talk and repress your cry at the same time but I managed to squeeze the words out. “What’s been going on with you? Everything just happened so quickly with you, you dumped Kevin for no reason and the following week you just left. You only wrote once to give your address and we never heard from you again. If your address hadn’t been a post office box, I’d have come looking for you. Sis, I’m really glad you’re home. In fact, I’m glad you’re alive because I honestly thought I’d never see you again. The bottom line is you’re still my little sister, and I deserve to know what has been going on with you. I’m sorry I’m crying but I am just so excited and so hurt at the same time. I don’t know what really I am feeling; I don’t know whether to hug you or slap you for putting us through this.”

“I’m so sorry sis, I really am. I knew you guys were disappointed in me and the thought of letting mom down was just too much for me to bear. At the same time I had certain desires that I needed to fulfil, certain curiosities that I needed to satisfy so I decided to leave and pursue my dreams. I didn’t want life to pass me by, and I didn’t want to be stuck here and not experience the world outside…”

As she spoke, I got lost in her words, thinking of how I once had those same dreams and aspirations. How I wanted to experience the big cities, travel to different places, see different things and meet new people. I had even saved money to move to the city, but sacrificed my savings to pay for her university education. I was hurt. How could she? After all that’s why she managed to graduate before I did. I took time off school to work and save money to put us both through university as well as help Paula finish off high-school, then she goes & runs off like this to pursue a dream that I sacrificed for her. I can’t say I was angry with her; I was more disappointed by her ingratitude than anything else. I faded back from my thought to hear what she was saying.

“…this place had nothing to offer me Dee, I just couldn’t see myself going to fetch water at the well every morning, cooking over a fire and inhaling the smoke everyday. Dee, take a look at mom, she worked like a slave raising us, taking care of dad and taking care of the land, and even now she’s stuck doing that stuff. I bet she’s slaving over the fire right now with two pots and dad is just sitting there telling stories like he always does.”

“Vera!” I yelled. I felt a cold chill on my body as she said that. I must have startled her with my sudden shout because she leaped off the bed. Then it occurred to me, she didn’t know dad had passed away. That’s why she hadn’t come home for the funeral or the memorial service. I couldn’t understand how she would not know, I wrote to her every month for the first two years. She would not reply and that didn’t surprise me; after all, she didn’t reply our letters when she was in university. I now had to break it to her.

“What is it Dee, why are you yelling?”

“Tell me something sis, did you get my letters? I wrote to you every month for 2 years until I got tired of not getting responses.”

“I got letters from you on the first 3 months, and I replied each one. I even wrote to you when you stopped writing. I always asked Mandla to mail them for me because our post office box is close to where he works.”

Mandla; I cringed whenever I heard that name. If there was ever a repellent made for me it was him. Everything about him did not agree with me. I just couldn’t put my finger on it but something about him wasn’t right. What made me loathe him was the fact that Vera broke up with a perfectly good man so she could go out with him. She thought he the best thing since sliced bread, but something about his character wasn’t right. Looking into his eyes, I could find no hint of honesty or goodness in him and that was enough for me not to trust him.

“Well I didn’t stop writing until two years after you left V, and the only reason I stopped is because I was getting no response and it was painful for me to continue. One of the last letters I wrote you was telling you that dad had passed away; when you didn’t reply that and didn’t show up for the funeral. I figured that you just didn’t care and wanted nothing to do with us.”

Vera had a stoic expression on her face and I could see a new pain dawning in her eyes. She covered her mouth and fell on her knees and as tears started from eyes and she let out a high shriek. If there is anything I hate more than the squeaking of the cart, it’s the sound of my sisters crying. It makes me feel so helpless. As I leaned over to hug her, there was a knock on the door. "Diana, its Kevin, can I come in?"

abstract by Tedd V. Chapter 4 coming on Jan 3